aJCfreak - Dan's Blog

Ever since I've been a lil kid, I've wanted to go to UK. I've dreamt of this and that. Green meadows and enchanting streams... Lovely lakes and lovelier lochs... The list goes on. And reading "The Highlander's Last Song" when I was 15 didn't help matters at all. So, it is with a heavy heart and a split conscience that I write this.... For, my brother left for UK last night. He he he... Couldn't resist that. Anyways, my bro's gone off to the UK for about two months which means I'm all alone in my two-bedroom house in Bangalore for the next two months. I just hope that I don't become bored sick..... :D C, the thing is that havin my bro around was real fun and cool. I had human soul for company. But now it's jus my CD player and me (ya, comp's broken down too!!!) I sure hope I survive these two months. Most probably when my bro gets back, he'll find a crazy, raving lunatic in my place.......................................... An...

A gentle whisper... A softer word... A touch so tender that it blows away every thought that my 'human' mind is debating. A thunderous roar... A stimulating wave... A dawn so stupendous that every breath that my body is inhaling is exhaled in a single gasp. The immortal addresses the mortal as if he were an equal. I am stunned beyond words, beyond anything that can be felt or expressed with any of the senses that my mortaity has gifted me with. I look awed upon the glory and the splendour of the One. The only One with the power to take away what I am and make me what I can never be otherwise. This only increases the realisation of my filthy existence. Like a child to its mother, I wish to cling to Him. But I hold myself back... How can I be what I want to be, when He is the very picture of perfection and glory? Can I still remain me if He stays with me? His look is deep. It penetrates my very soul. It reaches down into the depths of the night... The night that I just spent, no ...

I awoke in the middle of the night to find a warm body by my side. In the quiet stillness, thoughts of the previous night flooded my mind. Tingling my nerves and titillating my senses, I realised that this was the evil with which I have lain so many times before and I continue to lie, unable to leave that which has always been a part of me. I look at this monster, this person, this desire, this craving... And I sigh. This is my existence. This has been my existence for quite a long while now. The pattern of my thoughts shift toward the future, playing that age-old game of "Guess what's gonna happen tomorrow?" and the thought of what I would be doing after the break of dawn fills me with the deepest loathing for myself. For when the world sees the sun of tomorrow, I would wake with the world to embrace all that is good and all that the Lord suppliess to his human pets. Seemingly renouncing the evil that I myself chose to lie with, I would then go on to conquer my very love...

Hmmm.... I guess the real reason that I've never had a blog till date was that I thought that it would be a sheer waste of time and effort. Well, I'm beginning to think otherwise, so here I am.... Starting out on a journey which almost every other decent-headed bloke in the universe has begun.... And some have traversed so far into this voyage that ...... that I dunno what. But u know, so I guess that's cool! Take care y'all and I'll be writing in more often (hopefully)!!!